Then I started dating Ryan. The first time that I came to his house for dinner on our third date, I met his cat Trixie, and dog Bruin. I immediately bonded with his dog, but couldn't be fussed about the cat.
Over time that changed, I came to love Trixie and we were inseparable.
Then last august when I suddenly and unexpectedly lost my mom, we ended up moving in together. I work from home, so we cleared out of one his spare rooms and made it my office. Since then almost every day, all day Trixie and I have been together. I bought her a cat perch to put in my office window, I made one of the cubes in my expedit shelf into cubby for her. Trixie would sit, or nap on her perch all day while I worked. When we would leave, even if only to take Bruin for a walk, Trixie would be on her perch to watch us go and then come back.
When I would go out, if I was near a pet store I would always pop in to buy her something. Trixie was one of the best friends I could ask for. She was curious, playful, and oh so stubborn. Trixie would want to do something, but if you asked her to do it she would leave, wait about 1 minute, and then come back and do it as though she had thought of it. Trixie was only 9 this year, so I thought that I had plenty of years left with her.
Trixie loved to play, she loved to sit in the kitchen doorway and meow at me, then I would chase her down the hall to the bedroom where she would jump onto the bed. There I would either play with a laser with her, or a ribbon. Whenever I tried to change the sheets, or sort the laundry she made that into a game too. I would arrange the pillows on the bed into an obstacle course and pull a string in and around. She would wiggle, pounce, and chase it all over the bed.
Trixie slept on the bottom corner of the bed, on a red blanket that used to be mine. Usually in the middle of the night she change to be either sleeping on you, or snuggled up to you. Anything that I would put on the bed, Trixie would curl up onto and try to claim. Trixie had a little house on top of Ryan's dresser that she would also sleep in sometimes. It looked kind of like a teepee, and would get so warm in there. She would act all cute and then you would put your hand in to pet her and she would bite it. That was her game. Any time that I was sitting with a blanket on me she would jump up and curl up on my lap. Usually she would fall asleep, so would my feet or legs from her weight, but I couldn't move something so small and cute.
For Christmas I bought her a long piece of material on a stick, as well as a ton of catnip. Trixie loved the 'nip. The toy that I bought her entertained her for hours. I could even anchor it on top of the cupboards so that it hung down and she would play with it while I made dinner. Trixie would meow when it got tangled up, so that I could come and reset it.
Trixie had the cutest meows, she would meow to tell us her stories if we had left her overnight for a day or two alone. She would meow in the morning, or at dinner when I was going down to feed her. She would meow almost like a thank you when I would open the sliding door to let her back inside the house. What I would give now to hear them one last time.
On Friday Ryan and I went for dinner and then came back. We had made plans to go snowshoeing on Saturday and decided to get everything ready as we were leaving pretty early in the morning. Originally we had planned a date night, but we are lame and cut it short to come home and get ready for snowshoeing and watch a movie snuggled up on the couch. When I went downstairs to get my hiking boots Trixie was there in her area where her food dishes were, and another of her many play areas. Yes, Trixie had her own spot on every room of the house. Trixie and I snuggled for a bit and I petted her and gave her kisses. I used to give Trixie kisses every time that I left the house, came back, before bed, and pretty much all day. I came up with my hiking boots and Trixie in tow. She meowed to go outside, which I let her out.
It started raining a bit, so I opened the door and called her, she didn't come. I waited about 5 minutes and did it again, but still nothing. Ryan and I sat down to watch the movie, knowing that I would check the door every five minutes until she was back. We heard a noise, that sounded like something in the recycling bins on the deck. Ryan got up to see what it was, and then told me to come right away and that we had to get Trixie to a vet. I raced over and there was Trixie on her side, letting out a wheezing sound, and a little drool. Ryan raced to call the emergency vet line while I bent down and cradled her in my arms, petting her and telling her that everything was going to be ok. It was about after a minute of that, that she stopped breathing. I tried to resuscitate her, but she was gone. I have only ever felt more helpless once before in my life, and that was when I lost my mother.
Ryan's parents came over and we buried her in the backyard. After getting about 3 hours sleep all night, Saturday we undertook the painstaking task of packing all of her stuff away. Neither of us can stand to look at it. Every room in the house is a reminder of her, the worst being the bedroom, my office, and downstairs where her food, and her litter area were.
Trixie was the best cat that anyone could ever ask for. She made a non cat person into her best friend. She was always there to snuggle, play, and cheer you up if you had a bad day. I spent all day with her, and thought that I had so many days ahead of us. Any time that we were on holiday I would watch videos or look at pictures of her, missing her so much. I cannot even begin to describe the devastation, and the heartbreak that I am experiencing. I cannot even imagine how people who lose children cope with that. I know that with time this feeling will pass, and I will focus on the happy times. I miss her so much, and the house feels empty without her.
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